Monday, May 14, 2012

Best bud & Disclosure

My best buddy ever lives (or at least where he has a room, address & such) in a small town in the midwest.

He's pretty open about his HIV status and a fair number of his friends in this small town (think Hooterville) know him from high school.  While I & he lived in a big city being HIV positive wasn't THAT much of a big deal.  At least odds are enough people know someone who's positive too.

Well, recently my best buddy ever complained that in the course of a week, half a dozen or more of his high school friends defriended him on Facebook because "You have AIDS"  Now he and they have been out of high school for 20 or so years so it shouldn't be a big deal but to my best buddy ever, it is

Learning when to disclose isn't easy or to whom or even why.  He had NO plans to have sex with these people (currently the only  reason one has to disclose) but the small town thinking "just ain't right"

Last week I wore my {HIV POSITIVE} t shirt. I did get a few comments on it but not me (Thank you Wilton Manors) but its not every day wear.    I wonder if my best buddy ever would wear this in his small town though it may be his own Red Badge of Courage or Scarlett Letter.

How much longer until we all can live free from bias and not just health matters but in all things.
Race, age, location, etc all make up "These United States"  or as President Obama said "There's no red states or blue states but  a United States"   


Ron Romafosky wrote a song "Living with AIDS"
He's big and he's proud
He's abrasive and loud
He can roar like a lion or be meek as a lamb
God knows he's courageous
And sometimes outrageous
He inspires me to be all that I can
But I'll never forget
The last time we met
How my heart stopped at the story he told
He said "Life can be hard
When it deals you a card
That you never expected to hold."
But then he said "It's not the end
I rely on my friends
For all the affection and love they provide
And maybe with hugs
And without booze and drugs
There is still a good chance that I may survive."
And maybe he will
'Cause he's active still
He goes to the marches and all the parades
He's not giving in
He's determined to win
He's a person who's living with AIDS 






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